Winning and Losing...

I have been an athlete all of my life. I have been in the competitive ring since I can remember. When I was young, I enjoyed running and playing with you. Then things got serious and one I day found myself winning against you and taunting you afterwards. I allowed this drug to enter my being and develop my character. I could not lose, either, and would hate you if you beat me, despising you, and better worse, turning that hatred against myself into serums of worthlessness. Do you see that winning and losing is the same thing? They simply reflect opposite ends of the spectrum, but they both are results of an identifying illusion. I would encourage you not to enter the arena, but you cannot hear me can you? You cannot hear me because the adults have thrown you into the arena. Yes, your school teachers speak highly of you, passing grades for you. Some despise you for what you are (and what they are not0 and degrade you for that too. Through time, you might even see that it is beginning to bother you, however, everyone else is playing the game and you can't stand the thought of not belonging to something. You feel you have to take some side, whether it be a winner or a loser, it doesn't matter just as long as you don't have to look at yourself. As long as you can keep pretending. The reason you won't quit is because you don't see what it is doing to you or you can't put it down and leave it alone. You won't know what to do with yourself without something. You say to yourself, "Even though it causes me misery, at least, it is something to hold on to. Maybe we will win next week," and so on and so on. I have seen my life 50 times and it still produces more of the same. Competition and competitiveness are not the same thing. Little by little, a person may begin to see that attitudes based on ego-driven ideas about what is good and about what is healthy, maybe wrong. I, for one, am not good and I am not healthy. Christ pleaded that we should store our treasures in heaven, not where they can rust or be eaten by moths or where thieves can break in and steal them. Your trophies are waiting. You ask what are heavenly treasures? Seeing that these events are indeed happening inside of you and being willing to look at them, study what they are doing to you and allow truth to change you into a person that is, "not of that." Love, r