When It Is Over...

...something magical will come about. I have come to an understanding of the apostle Paul's words.. "though we were sinners, Christ died for us". So I put it out there for you to see. "God, would you please save me again." I am like you, very critical and hypocritical. I have lived a lie to myself and continue to blunder in the dark. I thought that I had found truth and have found nothing, but my egotistical sneakiness and my longing despair. I have lived your lie too and now there is nowhere else to run. Oh, but you will conjure up another pleasant surprise for yourself, won't you? You think you can fool everyone, so take all the drugs you want, justify everything for your own good, create laws to keep and take, take and keep, but in the end, you must face your redemption. You must suffer the withdrawals of your choices. Oh, how I love you and humbly speak and express the pains of the heart. I know I am not it, never was and never will be, but the best of all is I don't need to be. I do not substantiate truth. Truth substantiates itself. If there is a way out, I know it is not that way, I have lied long enough. love, r